No, that's not true, I don't detest Halloween. In fact, I love Halloween! I remember going trick-or-treating as a kid and just loving the feel of all that heavy candy in my bag! And knowing that it was all MINE! I have always been a quantity person and being able to gorge myself on candy and sweets was very comforting to me--and still is at times. Unfortunately, gorging yourself on candy isn't the healthiest way to comfort yourself. I'm still not sure what exactly I was looking for, but I sure didn't find it in that bag of candy.
When my kids came in last night and we surveyed the damage I couldn't believe the amount of candy on the counter. We separated all the different types of candy (you know, the good stuff in one pile and the okay stuff in another). There were at least FIVE pounds of chocolate bars--Twix, Reese's, Milky Way, M&M's, etc. Unbelievable! My kids are only 6 and 3 years old--what are they ever going to do with that amount of candy?
I had been pumping myself up all day, telling myself that I would have a few favorites and leave it at that. But after a stressful night of trying to get costumes right, holding Sammy every minute because he would not stop crying, running from the church party to the neighborhood trick-or-treat and missing dinner myself, I just lost it. Before I even knew what had happened, I was opening snack size bars and downing them like a contestant on Survivor!
I finally regained control, put the candy away and got the kids in bed. I called a babysitter and arranged to go to the step class on base to make up for some of the damage.
The step class was great this morning, but as soon as I stepped foot back in the house, I was acutely aware of the five pounds of chocolate bars sitting on top of the fridge. I had some babysitting courtesy of the Air Force this afternoon, so I took that time to get a manicure and clean the house. After cleaning, I was alone in the house and missing Ben so much that it hurt. Darn the military for taking him away from me for months at a time--without the ability to call or talk to him when I need him. So, what did I do? I grabbed the chocolate and downed I-don't- even-know-how-many-points in chocolate. Yeah, that was smart.
Things that I have learned today:
- Halloween is fun, but the stress of the candy isn't. It's leaving the house tomorrow.
- Fitting in an extra workout makes you feel better after you over-indulge.
- Chocolate doesn't make me miss Ben any less.
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